Saturday, July 14, 2012

Living With Hypothyroidism

As many of my friends and Family already know, I was diagnosed with Hypothyroidism approximately 15 years ago. Before I had any noticeable symptoms which I call my "per-hypothyroid" days or life, I had considerable control of my weight, my body was muscular, short and stocky(not fat but muscular) is a description that would fit. Bottom line I was shapely. If I gained 5 lbs I could reflect on what I was eating and make a few adjustments to my diet. Maybe I had too many servings of ice cream or I had eaten fast food too many times that month. I would make the adjustment and I would lose the weight with no problem.

Then, one day, I started feeling a bit tired all the time. My weight started fluctuating and I was putting on a few pounds, not much but enough to be noticeable. I did my usual routine but could not find where the problem was in my diet with what I was eating so I simply decreased my portion sizes. It didn't raise any red flags at that point and I just figured it was just that I was approaching 30 and some weight gain is normal with aging.

Around my 30th Birthday I began to really feel tired, little to no appetite, I was eating less but started gaining weight rapidly, my body began to hurt all over, I couldn't stop trembling, couldn't sleep no matter how tired I was. The more weight I gained, the more I tried to control it with diet or by eliminating caloric intake. My symptoms worsened, I got fatter and fatter. People began to say stuff about going on a diet. My boyfriend at the time was saying horrible things to me, like take the fork out of your mouth and stop pigging out so much, you are fat! He gave me a bike and said, I am not going to give you a ride anymore, (my car had broken down and wasn't working) walk or ride a bike fat ass. I simply got more and more sick. I went to the Doctor often and she said she didn't know what was wrong with me, (I was a self pay patient with no insurance coverage from my employer). She prescribed me an anti-depressant and said she thought if I got some sleep I would feel better. The medication had no effect. I did not sleep better and none of my symptoms went away.

The abusive comments from my shallow boyfriend grew worse and were right down abusive. After about six months I was down to the point where I was only eating 110 calories per day, 0 through beverages. (no soft drinks, juices or anything with calories). I was still sick and gaining weight.  Finally I got sick of seeing the doctor repeatedly and being put off being given antidepressants and physical therapy I blew a fit at the doctor and told her I was a self pay patient and I am paying cash for every visit, I could go to any doctor I want and if she doesn't figure out what is wrong with me this visit and do something that actually works, I would take my business elsewhere.  She finally ordered a TSH test (at the time was a cost of $10). Followed by a call a week or two later that I have hypothyroidism but she was going on vacation and would write me a prescription when she got back.

Two weeks later I had to bitch at her to write the prescription. Needless to say, I never went back to her again. Over the last 15 years, My weight has dropped considerably while doctors said my TSH levels were normal, I have gained weight while my doctors said my TSH levels were normal. I have been bitched at for being fat by doctors and others, I have been accused of doing drugs or anorexia when I lost weight. The truth is, since my thyroid decided to malfunction, I have had some but very little control over my weight. I have complaints about my hair falling out all over the place (like I have control of that).

For the past 7 months I have been very sick, I have been seeing a doctor and yes I have medical coverage and the coverage has switched me a few times this year from clinic to clinic. I am on the 4th clinic this year and have never seen the same doctor twice. I got as far a blood test, lowering my thyroid dose (huge decrease) by one doctor, Told I have Hashimoto's by another and suggested that there are options to explore but this clinic is not going to pursue any of them or treat me what-so-ever but I should come to my next appointment. The Dr. (?) said she will put in a referral to an endocrinologist which could take weeks or months. (yeah, like all of the times I signed releases to forward my medical record to the next new clinic I was changed to, who never got my medical records).  I have been lied to so many times in the past 7 months, put off, told to come back 4 - 5 times after nothing being done, no meds, no tests, no suggestions, after about the 5th visit, a doctor will order a test. So I have figured that the doctors want to be paid for office visits at least 5 times before ordering a test or consider doing anything that might lead to diagnosis, treatment or over all promoting good health for people with chronic conditions such as diabetes, Hypothyroidism, heart disease or any other chronic condition that could involve any kind of complications.

I have been unusually sick for the last 7 months, doctors have refused to do what is necessary for diagnosis or treatment. If they can not simply prescribe a narcotic pain pill or an antibiotic, they don't bother with diagnosis or treatment of any possible complication. Hell, the last girl I seen said I might need a medication that contains the T4 and T3 but didn't order the necessary blood test to determine if that was the case and did not change my medication or do anything. I don't even know if she was a real doctor. She didn't seem to know any more than I do and didn't seem capable of doing anything more than I am capable of doing myself such as her not ordering the T3 blood test. I am not a physician and can not order any tests, she (in my opinion) was not a real doctor because she could not order any tests.

Some who look at me may think that I am a fat ass who eats large portions and lots of cake and pie. They may think I am depressed because I feel like shit all the time because I am freaking sick and don't feel well enough to sit up straight and be all cheering and bouncy like a healthy person. Truth is, I am SICK, I am not over eating, I am not sad or depressed, I don't starve myself or have any eating disorder. I am simply sick.

If you are FAT and are wondering if you have Hypothyroidism, here are some things to consider.

1. Are normal plate's, bowls, cups, forks, and spoons just too small for you to get the portion size you need to feel full in one sitting? Are you turning to serving platters as your dinner plate or mixing bowls for your soup, ice cream, cereal? Do you need a 64 oz cup of milk with your meal?  If your answer to any of these questions are YES, then you are FAT because you simply eat to much.

2. If you have a combination of symptoms such as fatigue, loss of appetite, excessive hair loss, joint or body pain, weight gain or weight loss, slow heart rate or heart palpitations... Seek the help of a professional who should order a TSH (Thyroid Stimulating Hormone) test as well as some others to determine what the cause of your symptoms are.

In either case, seek the help and advice of a medical professional and if that professional does not discuss your health with you openly or you find yourself catching them in blatant lies, get a second opinion until you get a doctor or clinic who does what needs to be done and will communicate with you openly. eg. of a good honest doctor. You give doctor list of your symptoms, doctor gives exam, asks questions, order tests, sets appointment for follow up. On follow up doctor talks to you and explains the results of your tests. If the results show nothing and it is obvious that it is your lifestyle (such as your diet) that is the cause of your health issue, doctor should be able to clearly tell you that and give you advice or refer you to a nutritionist. If it is another medical condition than the Doctor should explain the condition, the treatment, and prescribe treatment or further tests.

I am currently in the position where I am trying to choose another clinic. When I take my valuable time to see a physician, I don't want to be told they know what could be the problem but they are not going to order the necessary tests to be sure or offer any treatment although there are clearly alternatives, they refuse to pursue them. I hate wasting my time with lazy ass professionals when I hate going to the doctor office in the first place. Like I have nothing better to do than to sit with a bunch of sick people for two hours past my appointment time to see a doctor who refuses to do anything for 5 visits before deciding to do something, anything at all. I mean really?

So not only do I have to hear all the Fatty comments, I have to feel sick for months on end because doctors are lazy and useless.  WTF?! Do I have to be a doctor so I can treat myself? Be a farmer so that I can get non-poisonous or non-enhanced foods? Do I have to be a freaken attorney to get a decent defense?

When I went to college and majored in Business, I figured I would not have to also go to medical school, Law school, take agriculture as well because there are no efficient or good professionals around out side my own profession. Hell, even the appointment setters can't freaken set an appointment and people wonder why corporations are outsourcing to other countries. All goes back to the more someone gets paid the lazier they become. A minimum wage fast food employee gives more effort in their jobs than highly paid professionals give in their career. They are so lazy that they even go as far as taking credit for an accomplishment that belongs to someone else. If they spent even the same amount of time and energy in actually doing their jobs as they do stabbing people in the back, the world would be a better place.

I hate being sick and I hate lazy and/or stupid doctors. I should not have to tell the doctor how to do a job the doctor went to college for. Even a green little intern should know more than I do. Ok, enough of my stupid rant. Moving on in my day. 

 


1 comment:

  1. I still end up seeing a few cracker jacks (a crackerjack is a professional that got their degree from a box of crackerjacks) here and there from time to time. After all these years I think I found a decent and knowledgeable Primary. Now, If I can just keep him. The GI specialist seems to be good but still waiting weeks to get approved for testing procedures, followed by weeks of waiting for an appointment to get them done, followed by weeks of more waiting to get the results of those tests, and so on. This time around I really hope I don't have something time sensitive that needs treatment now. I might just die waiting.

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