Rising From the Ashes

Since the death of my mom's mother, My family has been fighting and bickering. I am glad to have this Blog to say what I need to say and get it off my mind. The last couple of weeks have been very difficult for me, my mom and other family members. While it was all happening and I was emotionally involved in it all, I felt like I was never going to recover. Today I feel differently. I have had several family members tell me that they were supportive of me and that they are aware of the whole situation.

Today, I have a different perspective on the situation. I was told once that in order for change to take place, there must be some destruction and that at times it can be quite painful. It can be very difficult to accept change because of that. The destruction is very important so that change can take place and pave the way for something better, something different. (Out with old, in with the New)

Today, I know that my life is better with the recent change in my life. I did not realize how much the past abuse and those who perpetuated the old feelings from that abuse had been affecting my life and actually keeping me from allowing myself to become successful. This week I have been able to let go of the past and those who do not allow me to move forward in my life. It is like a huge tumor has been removed from my life and I actually feel a great relief. I believe this has been another part of the healing process that I needed in my life. I actually feel happier than I have ever felt in the past and for the first time in my life I actually see that I am capable of having a great future. I actually see the opportunity that I have for a positive future.

I actually realized this week that not only am I a good person and very strong considering what has happened in my life, but that I am also very intelligent and I have realized some of my talents. I was so worried about what the wrong people thought about me that I could not see how much the important people truly like and respect me. I discovered that I was trying to impress the wrong people. The people I was trying to impress were never going to like me or respect me or ever see any of my good qualities. They have never really wanted to. This week, talking to people who are influential and possess a great deal of respect in their community and who are successful, realizing that these are the people who are important and realizing that they take me seriously and respect me is an eye opening realization for me. I actually realized this week that I am a smart and talented business woman.

For the first time in my life, I see myself from a positive perspective. This week has been an amazing week and once I let go of the negative past and all of those who kept me in it, my perspective has become much more positive. It is as if someone turned the light on in a dimly lit room filled with beauty.

Had none of that Stuff happened over the last couple of weeks, I would have never walked out of the darkness into the light. It is said that all things happen for a reason. I am glad I got to see the reason so quickly. It is said, it is darkest before the dawn. I feel as though I have risen once again from the ashes.